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Entertainment

The three Christmas balls

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Sometimes a columnist has to sacrifice himself for the good of the community, take a bullet to protect the troops or take a slap in the face to keep the weakest from falling in battle.


So it’s done, friends. I stepped up to save you from a sneak attack of corny marshmallows and dripping feelings. I gobbled up three of Netflix’s top five movies this week, which are brand new Christmas TV movies with fallen Hollywood actors (we can’t get away with it), widowed, hyper-emotional protagonists the night before December 25th (classic), as well as grandmothers too involved in the emotional universe of their orphaned grandchildren (obviously).

is Christmas falls on time (Fall for Christmas) with Lindsay Lohan, Noelle’s diary (The Christmas diary) with Justin Hartley, aka twin Kevin in This is usas well as’A Christmas together (Christmas with you) which brings back into the spotlight Freddie Prinze Jr, a former darling of teen films such as She has it all And The pact of silence.

This perilous mission was punctuated by funky glow-in-the-dark sweaters, always-empty Starbucks coffee cups, and terrible snowstorms that stranded the characters in their super-decorated houses for three days.

However, this type of popular production requires a different critical approach, appropriate to the genre. In this saccharine, extra gratin world, we no longer speak of a “good film” or “excellent film”, but of the “best bad film”. The nuance is important.

Because we 100% assume these cheap cornflower blues aren’t going to sneak into the Oscars, come on. Let’s just hope we spend 90 minutes with our brains in jelly, feet on the ottoman, that’s all.

Of the three TV movies mentioned above, Lindsay Lohan’s, Christmas falls on time, turns out to be the least harmful and the most beautiful, let’s say it politely. The title alone sums up the whole plot. Lindsay Lohan plays the wealthy heiress of a hotel chain (well, well), a spoiled, rotten, selfish and materialistic influencer to the max. At the top of a luxurious Tremblant-like mountain that belongs to her tycoon father, Utah’s Paris Hilton falls on skis (Christmas really does!), hurtles down a slope at high speed, hits a tree and lands, she just can’t be, on the trail of a charming family hotel of logs and colonial furniture.

But now, our urban aristocrat who dresses like a Christmas ball has lost his memory since the accident and no one is looking for him, oops. Lindsay Lohan, who runs through the film on autopilot, then settles into the friendly lodge, which belongs to an attractive widower on the verge of bankruptcy.


WHITE PHOTO OF SCOTT EVERETT, PROVIDED BY NETFLIX

Christmas falls on time (Fall for Christmas)

Important addition: owner’s very warm little daughter on the verge of bankruptcy hopes her father will open her heart to love (insert sad piano here), which he hasn’t done since his wife’s tragic death, we are reminded 52 times . He brings out the mistletoe, the bells and, ta-dam, it’s the magic of Naël, to paraphrase Criquette Rockwell.

A Christmas together (Christmas with you), the second least missed of Netflix’s three made-for-TV movies, is an urban tale, which begins in the magnificent New York penthouse of a pop stars American Mexican. Our Latin singer spins poor quality cotton. Like, polyester. Her boyfriend, star of a soap opera, is silent as a broom. And her record company threatens to dump her if she doesn’t write the next one All I want for Christmas is you in three days. my God !

In a reversal as improbable as it is impossible, the pop stars bilingual knocks on the door of a 14-year-old fan who lives in the suburbs of New York and whose dad (it’s Freddie Prinze Jr!) teaches music at the local high school. Can you hear the beautiful music these strangers will make together while wearing their red and white pajama bottoms?


PHOTO JESSICA KOURKOUNIS, PROVIDED BY NETFLIX

A Christmas together (Christmas with you), with Aimee Garcia and Freddie Prinze Jr.

Even lowering expectations in the second basement of good faith, Noelle’s diary (The Christmas diary) is painful to watch. Here is Jake Turner (Justin Hartley, always playing the same role), famous big city writer who has chosen celibacy, yes, yes, while all his readers have a crush on him. A few days before Christmas, Jake the reclusive novelist returns to his hometown of Bridgeport, Connecticut, to clear out the house of his mother, who died suddenly. Jake was no longer seeing his mother, who over the years had become a compulsive hoarder. For 35 years Jake hasn’t spoken to his father, who lives in reclusion in Vermont, where else? And Jake’s older brother died in 1987 in an accident with a tree branch and a Christmas decoration that won’t make you cry.


PHOTO KC BAILEY, SUPPLIED BY NETFLIX

Noelle’s diary (The Christmas diary), with Justin Hartley and Barrett Doss

Now enters a young translator who believes that her biological mother was Jake’s nanny in the 80s. Wow, what a reversal! Together, Jake and the young translator will write a new chapter of their respective diaries, not without experiencing the horrors of the worst blizzard of the century.

They are cold, they are hungry, they are almost naked. But Jake and the young translator are the children of God and must love each other with a naive love the fragility of velvet words!

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